I think i’ve written about this before, but defending my character and honor is worth an extremely high amount to me. It is who I am, and I am willing to endure attacks and unrest for the preservation of this.

But on the other hand, I am willing to admit flaws and things I am working on ? I readily admit fault and I am a good apologizer I guess. I dont actually take those things as hurting my character? Perhaps because I respect people more who admit their mistakes and are willing to do something about it.

I am willing to do anything to improve my character, well as long as fear doesn’t overwhelm me. Stupid fear, why must things like rejection or failure hold me back! They might not even be manifested , I could be successful and yet the possibility still bothers me.

Most of all I just want to be Sheridan, and I feel so powerful when I am the person I’m made to be, its like when I am walking on the road that was laid out for me, I can sprint and jump and have sure footing! It’s awesome. However getting off track is scary, and there are times that I’ve really fallen and caused a lot of hurt, not only for myself but for others. I wish I could learn how important it was to stay true without messing up. But messing up sure has taught me that I dont want to mess up again.

Also, I think the way I can be a positive influence or help others is to be in a good place myself. Two messed up people can sorta maybe make a hodgepodge of fixing but I’d rather be in a good place before I can extend my hand out for others. And when I mess up I hope the person I reach out for is also in a solid place since there are many sources of ‘help’ that aren’t actually helpful at all.